Showing posts with label school.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label school.. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 8

why i love UP.

it is not uncommon for me to be asked by friends why i adore UP so much. some of them even say that i interject my UP musings even when i talk about the most obscure things. and each time i am asked this, i always clam up. i do not answer right away not because i do not know what to tell them, but it is because i know what the answer is, and this certainty is what makes me think hard before i speak, for i do not wish to give them a few undiscerned sentences which do not really give justice to the love that i have for UP.


it has almost been 8 years since i was in one of Palma Hall's classrooms, listening attentively to Atty. Jamon as he tells us yet again that we are the future molders of this country. this is what i miss most about UP education: for with every new learning that i acquire in class, i am constantly reminded that i am part of a larger configuration. that intelligence does not just exist for its own sake, for to do so would be to betray the numerous souls who look up to the iskolars ng bayan for the improvement of their own lot. learning is inextricably linked with a transcendental ideal, because a mere narcissistic absorption of the discourses that happen in class translates to an abandonment of what the taxpayers -- the farmers, the lower class workers, the OFWs -- expect of us.


in UP, one breathes the interconnectedness of all knowledge, so much so that the delineation between theory and praxis is virtually not there anymore. the four walls of the classroom fail to contain the burning idealism that iskos and iskas have, because every UP student knows that the acquisition of knowledge is only the beginning -- for what is more important is the application of these newfound ideas to better the situation of our underprivileged countrymen. a UP-educated friend once quipped that the accumulation of knowledge is essentially a narcissistic venture: that people thirst for knowledge because it is a response to the self's insatiable need to enhance itself, and that the positive consequences of this yearning is merely consequential and thus unintended.


in my mind, I can only ask him: if it is through the blood and sweat of taxpayers that we are able to obtain our education, is it then apt for us to tell them that any good deed that we do after we graduate is out of charity?


in UP, one is taught to always hold on to the ideal. in a country that is afflicted with paralyzing hopelessness, UP provides that beacon of hope to students as it reminds them that yes, darkness may exist, but if we extinguish what little flicker of idealism that we have left, then who will fend off the darkness? it is this assurance of potential and promise which makes UP students strive for perfection, because they know that with collective idealism, the promise of achieving the great filipino destiny is always an ideal that is capable of realization.


UP has made me realize how minute i am in this universe, but that it is this very smallness which makes me capable of clinging on to something that is incapable of extinguishment. yes, i may be small, but i am part of a collective endeavor that will soon see the emancipation of this country from the shackles of hopelessness and desperation. if only for this alone, i will forever be indebted to UP, and constantly promise her that in God's time, i shall help her achieve what this country rightfully deserves.

Monday, August 8

courage.

because i need to take a breather from the madness of it all, i will momentarily sever my ties with monotony and revisit my penchant for emotional clutter.

how are you?

it's heart-warming to know that you are okay.

me? well, i really can't tell.

what is being okay really? is it being subdued by your knowledge that life is perfect, the sky is blue, the birds are chirping, and your mug is brimming with beer froth?

if that is the standard for adequate happiness, then i clearly digress from the mold: so i must be truthful to you and own up to my misery.

i find perfect sense, nowadays, in the regularity of being submerged underneath the suffocating cloud of law books and jurisprudence, but during days when the monotony becomes unbearable and my brain bleeds from constantly being beaten to the pulp, i look at the scars on my hands, and i think:

are these hands capable of the greater task that lies ahead? are they capable of sustaining more wounds and shedding more blood for the dream that is incapable of death?

or am i merely duping myself into believing that this is the path that i am destined to tread?

law school, thus far, has sifted out from my soul the duality of my innate frailty and my long-forgotten capacity for optimism. for during dark days when my own humanity incapacitates me to continue trudging forward, i am reminded of why my life, for countless times before, had silently imploded right before my eyes.

but during days when my spirit is indefatigable and i see light in even the darkest of nights, i am buoyed by my knowledge that even when i think it to be impossible, i am, after all, still capable of optimism.

at this point, i am uncertain as to whether the stars will align for me, or if the universe has laid down a path that is unknown to me yet. and i know i do not have the most persevering spirit, but when my heart tells me to keep moving forward, i am in no position to argue against what it wills me to do.

for when death devours my soul and there is nothing left to cling on to for redemption but hope, i know my heart will reattach my broken pieces back and whisper to me the words that will give me courage.

Sunday, June 19

momentary bidding.

from theoden, king of rohan: and so it begins.

i will be inaccessible for the time being because apparently, law schooling can be so dehumanizing. and even when i know most of my time will be consumed by it in the next couple of months, i will still try to resurface from time to time here.

wish me luck, earthlings.

or better yet, help me pray that my sanity will still be intact once the mayhem starts to devour me whole.